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With all of Europe in turmoil and the Catholic Church in the public eye because of the child molestation cases, is it possible that we aren’t safe in Lebanon from these horrors as well?

 

For the past decade, stories of little boys being abused and raped behind the doors of the church have been resurfacing. Stories that date back all the way until 1960 and possibly further.

In addition to the actual sexual abuse, the problem lays with the members of the Catholic Church who knew what was happening and chose not to report it or to not do anything about it. A specific case is that of Reverend Peter Hullermann who was convicted of abusing minors in 1986.

However, all that happened was that he was suspended for 18 months and fined a fine of $2,000, and he was allowed to work with children once again. A psychoanalyst who had examined him at the time demanded that Hullerman never be allowed to interact with children again.

The big problem here is that Hullerman’s case wasn’t the only one that was just swept under the carpet and he was allowed to work with children once again. Child molesters found that they could easily abuse children behind the closed doors of the church according to the report Hiding Behind the Cloth by Kathryn A. Dale and Judith L. Alpert published in August of 2007.

But it’s not only happening behind Church doors. Here in Lebanon, it happens behind the mask of family friends and those offering to “help”.

Yasser’s Story

Yasser* is a ten-year-old boy that lives with his family in Beirut. He is the youngest of three and has an older brother and sister. His parents aren’t that well-off, and both his parents work for long hours. His mother comes home at 8:30pm and his father comes home at midnight. Yasser is like any ordinary child, except for the fact that he was raped.

He goes to a public school near his house, and often hangs out in a tiny store by his house. The shop owner has known Yasser’s parents for almost 18 years. Because Yasser is often alone after school, he would stay at the shop. Yasser’s parents considered the man as close to them as a member of the family and entrusted Yasser in his care the nights that they were working especially late. He even used to attend parent/teacher conferences on their behalf.

The shopkeeper would often give Yasser things he couldn’t afford such as chocolate, good, games and sometimes money while always trying to touch him. Due to his young age, Yasser didn’t understand what the man was doing was wrong until that day that he raped him.

It started off as an ordinary day, Yasser finished school and headed to the shop. The shopkeeper offered him cigarettes and they smoked. At around 6pm, the shopkeeper told Yasser that he had a nice gift for him at his house and took him to his house. When they got to the house, the shopkeeper told Yasser to take off his pants. Yasser refused and started to get scared.

He then grabbed a knife and held it to Yasser’s throat and told him that he would kill him. After the shopkeeper finished, he told Yasser that if he mentioned what happened to anyone, he would kill him. Yasser kept his mouth shut for weeks and tried to avoid the man, however, it was nearly impossible as his parents were very close to the shopkeeper.

Yasser eventually told his brother what happened, and Yasser’s brother went to threaten the shopkeeper instead of going to the police. He wanted to kill the shopkeeper, but couldn’t do it, so the man simply left the country.

Other rape incidents

The First Lieutenant* in the Lebanese Internal Police opened up the folder and there, stacked inside was case over case of child molestation and child rape cases in Beirut. However, that isn’t the most worrisome part. “Nobody comes to report the cases. It’s considered a scandal to the family, so instead, they try to cover it up and these predators stay free,” Said the First Lieutenant.

One of these reports contains an unusual story of a man who would go door to door selling iron. He stopped by a house with a family of 3 girls, a mother and a father. The father invited him in for some coffee and the defendant sat with him and drank the coffee. He later monitored the house and found out the hours when the father was out at work.

The defendant stopped at the house at a time the father wasn’t at home and told the wife that he needed to use the bathroom. Once inside, he told her that he felt a negative spirit in the house and that she needed his services to rid the house of the devil, however, she could not speak a word of this to her husband. The wife agreed.

He came back and lit candles and chanted some hymns and told her that the house was now rid of the spirit but it had flown into her 15 year old daughter. He then told her he needed to take her daughter into the next room. The wife asked if she could come in with them. He replied no as the spirit would fly into her once it had left her daughter. She consented and the defendant took the girl into the bedroom alone.

A neighbor was passing by for some daily woman talk and the wife told her what was going on. The neighbor was shocked and told her to quickly go and check on her daughter. They opened the door and saw the man was naked on top of the girl, who was also naked. They chased the man out and the wife told the husband what had happened as soon as he came home. They reported it to the police and a couple weeks later, the man was arrested.

The Internal Police can’t do much besides arrest offenders when they have viable proof of something happening. If someone comes forward they are able to interfere, otherwise, they really can’t do much. “Families don’t come forward when these things happen because it’s like a scandal. They don’t want to report it. If only they would report it, then we could get out a warning list or some sort of advisory on the news because often we see the same stories over and over again with no details changed.”

A report from about four years ago catches his eye on the desk. A girl and her mother lived alone and the mother’s brother used to often come over and visit and take care of the little girl when her mother was at work. At the age of 5, he started to help the girl bathe by washing her back. At first, she was startled but it became a routine that her uncle would help bathe her.

When she turned 8, he started to wash her entire body during her baths. She was startled once again, but it continued. By the time she was 11, he was raping her on a regular basis and she didn’t think anything of it because she didn’t know it was wrong since boundaries had been crossed at such a young age.

“We need to raise awareness about these issues and educate the public,” said the First Lieutenant.

Another case is the story of a little boy that happened a year ago. He was raped and found dead near the sea in Tripoli. The rapist had been raping the boy and the boy had started to think about telling on the rapist, so the man killed the boy and threw him into the sea. “It’s very sad. If that boy hadn’t been killed, nobody would’ve ever known that he was being raped,” said the First Lieutenant.

Law in Lebanon

Lawyer Ibrahim Al Arab said that Rape is defined in Lebanese Law as performing sexual acts without the approval and consent of the other party. Sexual abuse is the practice of sexual relations in spite of the victim by blackmail, psychological pressure, and physical pressure.

Article 503 from the Lebanese Law states that if someone is forced to have intercourse without marriage and with threat of violence, the rapist will be punished in hard labor for at least five years and faces sentence of seven years if the victim is less than ten years old.

If the result of rape is death of the person, Article 549 of Law 302/94 states that it is punishable by death.

In addition, Article 505 of the Lebanese Penal Code No. 513/96 of intercourse with a minor under the age of the Fifteen is punished by imprisonment with hard labor. The penalty shall be not less than five years if the child is twelve years old.

Intercourse with a minor that completed fifteen years of age and not yet eighteen will be punished by imprisonment from two months to two years.

The punishment serves two purposes. “The first is to deter the criminals from the rest of the tradition of the offender, and the second is reform.” There is also blame to be put on the parents who give enough attention to monitor their children. Absence of family remains the direct cause behind every criminal act.

Safety Tips for Teenagers (As instructed by Internal Police)

•             DON’T RUN AWAY FROM HOME!  If life at home is unbearable, talk to a teacher, your local minister, your doctor or someone at your local crisis center.  If you run away, you will soon be at the mercy of street people who might try to push you into drugs, pornography and/or prostitution.

•             Be very wary if a stranger or someone you don’t know very well offers to be your friend.  Remember that when you’re feeling lonely or depressed, you’re an easy target for strangers who pretend to care about you.

•             Never accept any invitations to offbeat, lonely areas.  Be wary of people who offer you jobs that seem too well-paid.  If you want to work part-time, find a job through legitimate channels like a student job placement office.  Check all references of potential employers.

•             Never agree to have your photograph taken by someone who promises to make you famous.  He or she might be trying to take advantage of you.  Tell somebody you trust immediately.

•             Never get into a car with strangers or people you don’t know very well.  Be careful not to walk too close to cars, because someone might grab you and pull you in.  NEVER HITCHHIKE!

•             Go around in groups or with a friend — there’s safety in numbers.

•             Never go into dark or lonely areas, especially at night.

•             Never accept dares to do foolish things, such as going to deserted or badly lit places.

•             Always tell your parents where you are going to be and let them know when you change your plans.

•             Never babysit for people you don’t know.

•             If anyone tries to touch or caress you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, say “NO!” right away.  Remember to report the incident to someone you know immediately.  Even if you’re on a date, you have the right to say “NO!”.

•             Be wary of people loitering around your school, home or favorite hangouts.  Be observant.  A good description of a person can be very helpful during a police investigation.

•             Never accept offers of alcohol, cigarettes or drugs.

•             Trust your instincts:  the little voice in your head is usually right.

•             Remember, it is not your fault — so don’t be afraid to tell if someone has bothered you.

Safety Tips for Grade School Children

•             Always tell your parents where you are going.

•             Go around in groups or with a friend — there’s safety in numbers.

•             If you see someone hanging around your school or play areas, tell an adult you trust.  Learn to give good descriptions of people:  is the person tall or short, dark-skinned or pale?  What is the name and model of his or her car?  What is the license plate number?

•             Never go into lonely areas at night.

•             Never accept offers of jobs, outings or gifts from a stranger.

•             If someone you know asks you to accompany him or her, never go without asking your parents first.  Let the person know that your parents have agreed to let you accompany him or her.

•             Never accept dares to go to deserted or badly lit places.

•             Running away isn’t a smart thing to do.  You can always find someone to talk to about your problems, no matter how bad they are.

•             Never answer the door when you are alone at home, and never tell anyone that you are alone at home either.

•             If somebody calls persistently or tries to break into your house, call the police immediately.

•             If people in a car ask you for directions, step back and tell them you don’t know.  Walk away quickly.

•             If someone touches you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, say “NO” and tell an adult  you trust.  Nobody has the right to touch you in any way that makes you feel uneasy.  Don’t stop talking about it until you find somebody who listens to you and believes you.  Remember, YOU haven’t done anything wrong.

•             Never go anywhere with a stranger or even someone you don’t know very well.  Always insist on getting permission from your parents first.

•             Parents and their children should share a secret password.  If someone tells you that your parents asked him or her to take you somewhere, don’t go unless that person is able to give you the secret password.

Safety Tips for Young Children

Note to parents:  These tips are for children who are too young to read.  Try not to frighten your child, but make sure he or she learns the following rules by repeating them on several occasions:

•             Never get into a car with a stranger.  If someone you don’t know asks you to get into the car, tell your parents.

•             Always play with a friend.

•             Never accept candy or other gifts from strangers or anyone else without asking a parent first.

•             If a stranger tries to take you somewhere, run home..

•             Scream for help and run if you are being followed by someone, or if someone is following you in a car.

•             Practice dialing your number with the area code.  (Parents should make a list of important names and numbers and leave it next to the phone.  Go through the list with your child and have him or her practice dialing these numbers and talking with the people who answer).

•             Memorize the secret password and only go with people who know the password.  Remember that this word is a secret that you shouldn’t share with anyone other than your parent(s).

•             Never let someone touch any part of your body that a bathing suit would cover.  Never let someone touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable.  If anyone does touch you in this way, tell your parents or somebody you trust immediately.

•             Remember that your parents love you and that you will never be punished for telling the truth.

•             Never go anywhere without first asking for permission from a parent or babysitter.

 (You might want to make sure your child has understood these tips by playing the “what if game”).

Safety Tips for Parents

•             Keep in a safe, accessible place, your child’s digital fingerprints, a precise, up-to-date physical description and a portrait photograph from the shoulders up.

•             Make sure your children know their full telephone number and address.

•             Make sure you always know where your children are.  Also be sure to set a good example by letting them know where you are at all times.

•             Never leave your child alone in a public washroom.

•             Make sure your child is always accompanied.

•             Make sure that your child’s name is never visible, e.g. on clothing, a bicycle or toys.  A child is less likely to fear someone that knows his or her name.

•             Teach your children to avoid speaking to strangers or people they don’t know very well.

•             Never leave your children alone in the toy section of a department store or allow them to wander around shopping malls.  If they get lost or are bothered by someone, tell them to ask the nearest cashier or salesperson wearing an ID pin for help.  Make sure that they can easily recognize cashiers and employees and tell them to never leave a store or mall if they get lost.

•             Become involved in your child’s activities and get to know his or her friends.

•             Listen to your children when they tell you they don’t like somebody.  Try to find out why.

•             Be on the alert if someone pays undue attention to your child.

•             Never make light of your children’s fears and concerns, even if you think they are unfounded or imaginary.

•             Tell your children that if something happens, you will look for them until you find them.

•             Parents and children should share a secret password.  If someone wants to take your child somewhere, seemingly at your request, your child should refuse to go with that person unless he or she knows the secret password.

 *NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED/OMITTED IN ORDER TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT.

(I wrote this article with my class mate Israa Ziade /  @SasoZiade)